Is not ejaculating for 30 days healthy?
Today is my 30th day without having an ejaculation and I’ve had plenty of sex and masturbation during this time and I’ve had orgasms also during these 30 days. I didn’t look at porn once, I didn’t have a single wet dream, and I didn’t get blue balls at all. All of this was possible because I’ve used some of the techniques that I’ve learned through studying Tantra and Taoist sexuality and some practical Western exercises as well.
The Timeline of the Experience
Days 1 to 5: The Hangover and Normalization
For the first couple days after my last ejaculation I went through the typical orgasm hangover or post-coital dysphoria that I normally do where my energy levels drop, my sexual desire drops, my overall zest for life goes down, and then slowly starts to come back up.
Around day four and five, my energy levels started to normalize. I started to feel more full from the inside out. When I had sex during that time around day four or five, I didn’t really have to work so hard not to ejaculate because I had ejaculated so recently that buildup of pressure wasn’t really there.
Days 8 to 10: Building Pressure and Mental Clarity
Around day eight, nine, and ten, the energy levels started to build more and more and I had to work harder to not ejaculate. There was a buildup of pressure and it took more intention and took more practice for me to circulate that energy through my body—through my fingers, through my heart and my mind, and through everything—so it didn’t leave my body through my cock in an ejaculation.
There are some really important things that I think you should know if you’re going to try this practice I included one of my favorite exercises to do right after sex to move that energy throughout your body, Another thing that happened around day 10 was that my clarity just with life in general increased.
Day 15: Managing Peak Energy Levels
Moving on to around day 15, everything raised even more, so did my desire to ejaculate or my physical response to ejaculate. When I had sex during this time, I had to really work at it to not ejaculate. When I self-pleasured, I had to make sure that I didn’t bring myself right up to the edge of ejaculation because it would have been easy for me to go over that edge. So I stayed a little bit back and I did actual practices and exercises like Qigong and yoga and some tantric techniques, and just physical exercise like going on a run or lifting weights in the gym to help disperse some of that energy and get it out of my body in a different way than just ejaculating.
The Psychological and Life Shifts
Days 18 to 20: Alignment with Life Purpose
Now the kicker: around day 18 and 19 in there, there was a fundamental shift in my experience of life purpose. What I mean by that is I’ve had ideas of what it is that I want to be doing—I’ve written about it in my journal and visioned about it—but somehow the combination of me not ejaculating and being intentional with that energy created a scenario in which my life purpose has merged with my body in some way that I haven’t experienced before. It feels amazing; it’s like a compass that’s guiding me through the world and it’s helping me to move past things and away from things that will take my energy.
Interestingly, during this time I got a huge job opportunity for next month. It was going to be at least $10,000 worth of work for me in a month—that’s a lot—and ultimately I didn’t take the job because it didn’t feel right. It wasn’t aligned with what it is that I want to be creating, and this practice helped me with that. If I get into my head it’s a little scary, but it feels right and I’m going to stick with that right now.why I gave up that job because it triggered my deep stuff around a scarcity mindset, around not pursuing my passion but continuing to say “oh eventually I will do this,” and around being passive in the world and not proactively going after what I want.
Integration and Internal Ease
Another cool thing that started to happen around day 18, 19, and 20 is that the intensity—this kind of excess energy that I had been feeling from day 10 and day 15—integrated into my system. It went from feeling like “wow, excess energy that I had to integrate” to something that was just in me, and there was an ease that came with it. There was a release of sorts, but not a release of tension out into the world; rather, a release of myself from holding onto this energy and trying to do something with it. A release of it just flowing in me more naturally, and that was really cool.
Reflections at Day 30 and Moving Forward
Redefining Pleasure and Orgasm
I still feel that today on day 30. I feel very peaceful, I feel at ease, and I also feel really on point and like I have this trajectory that is moving me forward along my life purpose that feels awesome. Over the past 10 days when I have had sex, I haven’t had to work as hard to not ejaculate because this energy has just been integrated into me. The experience of not ejaculating during sex became more normalized, and I became more comfortable with the experience of pleasure and orgasm not being associated with ejaculation.
Moving forward from day 30, I will probably have an ejaculation within the next few days. I do actually enjoy ejaculation—believe it or not, I think they’re really hot, they’re fun, and they’re a different flavor of the sexual experience that I enjoy. I just enjoy doing them with intention and infrequently, because the more I ejaculate, the less pleasurable it becomes and the less good my life is overall.